My Poor Honey Bear

Poor Honey Bear

This morning I added
a bit of honey to my yogurt.
I think I permanently
maimed my honey bear.
Poor thing.


29 responses to “My Poor Honey Bear

  1. Ooooh. That’s gotta hurt!

    I thought for a moment you were talking in euphemisms, so I’m somewhat relieved to learn that you’ve just been maiming household wildlife and not your “Dirty Little Secret”

  2. what a sweet idea to have a honey bear.

    i like the shades of red in the pic, especially the brick wall.

  3. Nope, Dive. It was a literal honey bear. It’s raw honey from a local farm, and it’s crystalized a bit (I like it that way, so I haven’t heated it). Unfortunately that meant that I had to give the bear a really good squeeze. It’s still smushed.

    Gaijin Girl (hey, I spelled your name right today!), honey bears are popular around here for small amounts of honey. I find them adorable. That is until they are smushed.

  4. Oh, and as for the brick, it is from the center chimney that runs through my living room (common in old New England houses). That and the loft sold me on this place.

  5. No no, the honey bear is fine. He knew what kind of life he signed up for when he allowed the honey people to take the top of his head off and pour honey into his previously empty husk of a body. You can always fix him when he’s empty, anyway.

  6. Yep, you can’t have honey unless it comes from a honey bear. Squeeze him a little on the sides, and he’ll pop right back into shape. hee hee

    French press? I love coffee from a French press. I wonder what the French call them.

  7. True, true, Before Girl. Did you ever see True Romance? Brad Pitt’s character (he’s really good, and it’s really funny) has a novel use for a honey bear.

    Robyn, I tried to get him back to normal, and it didn’t work. I have French press coffee every morning. I don’t know what the French call them, but they make for excellent coffee.

  8. Okay. Now I’m piqued again. What’s a “French Press”?
    It sounds kinda rude (like the “French Entry” or the “Swedish Entry” in the Eurovision song contest).

    Over here, my yummy local honey comes in a jar full of honeycomb from the local organic butchers (of all places).

  9. The coffee pot, gutter boy.

  10. I was still confused (it’s my age), so I looked it up on Google Image Search only to find it’s a cafetiere.

    I had eight of those little buggers hiding in my kitchen (if you recall my coffee machine dumping episode, my total was “Five (count ’em) nice shiny new Italian spurty coffee machines … and eight cafetieres … and an old percolator … and a selection of those octagonal aluminium espresso makers …”).

    I only use a little octagonal espresso maker now (and I’ve got no idea what thoses are called either but it makes great coffee).

  11. I several of those octagonal espresso makers. I make espresso when I’m home and can have a real breakfast. Since I usually just have to bring yogurt and honey to work (with muselix), I make the French press coffee.

    Thanks for the new vocab word.

  12. Me too, though I’m kinda disappointed it wasn’t rude …

  13. My honey bear thanks you.

  14. Blow into his head. If you hum it could be rude. Then Dive will be happy and Honey Bear will return to his proper shape.

  15. muselix = forest sweepings. Nuts, roots, dirt, pine needles and a bit of New England granite for roughage.

  16. I used to collect those bears when they were empty for the optimistic reason that someday i would no longer be allergic to fur and i could use them as bottles for my menagerie of fuzzy creatures. (i was five at the time, and heartbroken that I could never have a pet.)

    I’ll miss you in my retirement, but I’ll be sure to keep up with your posts, love. wish me luck!

  17. Rootie, since I’ve tried to be a nice girl of late, I’m not going to say what popped into my not-so-clean mind.

    Before Girl, muselix is wonderful. Delicious, healthy, and a hell of a lot better than Froot Loops.

    Taihae, you are dearly missed. Thank you for stopping by. I’m sorry for your traumatic experience. Perhaps you could make one out of crystal?

  18. You sick bastard…

    How could you? ;)


  19. Rootietoot’s right. Dive would DEFINITELY be happy!

  20. I know, I know. I’m so mean, Steve. I maimed my honey bear. And for what? Yogurt and muselix.

    Dive (*shaking head, unable to speak*), you are incouragable.

  21. And, of course, Sassy (who almost gave her real name there) can’t spell. How did I come up with that? I meant incorrigible .

  22. I think of myself as more “encourageable”.

  23. There is absolutely NO WAY that Muselix is better than Froot Loops. I don’t even know where to start…Froot flavors, not forest sweepings. Loops, not grainy bits like sand in the bottom of the cereal bowl. Colorful, not muck that looks like it was left after a snowplow went by. Possibly cheaper to buy, as well.

  24. Mine’s even worse, BG; I have 50 percent organic meusli, 50 percent organic oats and (inevitably) local organic milk.
    Sure, it’s like sucking the dust out of an old carpet, but it makes the rest of the day seem REALLY GREAT after suffering that for breakfast.

    And getting back to politics, Sassy; great news over the past couple of days that Bam-Bam’s gearing up to beat the crap out of Hillary.
    May I be the first to congratulate you on your upcoming first black president?

    Having said that, the Republicans may yet put up Condi to run against him, covering the black vote, the womens’ vote AND the insane vote. And the insane voter has had a pretty good track record of late.

  25. Speaking of republicans and coffee presses….if we want to go hardcore Republican circa 2003, we can call it an “American Press.” te he.

    I bet it’s just whatever French is for “coffee press” or “coffee pot”

  26. Let’s not go back to Freedom Fries. It was embarassing.

  27. It’s cafetiere, young Carissa.
    Do pay attention!

  28. My appologies, Dive. I thought that cafetiere was how the British referred to the contraptions as you were not familiar with the term “french press.”

    Just don’t order a Mocha Latte and we can still be friends

  29. Ew! Mocha latte!

    I’m a straight latte at breakfast and espresso the rest of the day man.

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