Tag Archives: Dumb W

The Sassy Sundries: My Week in Review

Phew! That was a week. Well, it’s time to return to the Sassy Sundries, my on-again, off-again weekly tally of events personal, political, and nonsensical. It’s a stolen idea, and I’d point you to the Dig’s web site, but they are going all Office Space on it right now. One hopes that the new incarnation will load faster and bear no resemblance to their ghastly new glossy covers.

Without further ado, here are the week’s Sassy Sundries:

WTF!!?? W, who as governor of Texas wouldn’t commute the death sentence of a man whose public defender SLEPT through his trial, and who supported the execution of the mentally retarded, and in some cases, the innocent (exculpatory evidence be damned!) thinks that a few years in the clink for a guy who lied about a matter of, I don’t know, national security, is too much? I wish that the brazenness of this Administration still shocked me, but it doesn’t. Minus Five

It’s W’s birthday today—an insult to good Cancer folk everywhere. The New Yorker has several illustrations for your enjoyment. I remember hearing somewhere that Morrissey sends the Queen dead vegetables on her birthday. Perhaps we need a similar tradition here. In any event, I’d like to wish W a very unhappy birthday. Minus Two

Anyone who has been reading this bloggy thing knows that my personal life has been one big, scary rollercoaster of late. I’m hanging on. You all have my gratitude for your support. Even for situation/Plus Ten for friendship

It looks like Rupert Murdoch will get his hands on the Wall Street Journal. The paper’s conservative editorial page is about to go fascist. Aren’t free-market conservatives supposed to resist monopolies? Here’s to hoping that something will intervene to stop the deal. Minus Four

BBC reporter Alan Johnson freed. World rejoices. Plus Five

It’s been twenty years since the Beastie Boys released License to Ill. I don’t think I can stay awake until Brooklyn anymore. But I’m still crafty. Even

OK, this is overdue, but the Roberts Court ended its disastrous first term, overturning precedent after precedent with Orwellian glee (racial integration is racist!). W has a legacy after all. Help us. Minus Five

Attempted suicide bombings in the UK set everyone on edge. Minus Five

Fourth of July a bit of a snoozeroo with the miserable weather and all. The big excitement came from being able to watch the Boston fireworks in bed. Plus Two

Thought I lost my all-time favorite travel mug. I found it sitting on the kitchen table and laughing at me. Not having to give up my attachment fills me with relief, but I have much to think about with new mantras from blog pals. Plus Ten

Total Plus: 27
Total Minus: 21

Last Time’s Total: + 18

The Sassy Sundries: My Week in Review

Ah… A Friday off. Of course, it’s for a family wedding, which means one thing for this single woman in her thirties.

With that in mind, here are the week’s Sassy Sundries (WARNING: Grey’s news ahead):

Today I will be Bridget Jones, my spinsterhood on display as a cautionary tale. Everyone will ask me (or worse, my mother) what happened. You are such a pretty girl, Sassy. Why has no one scooped you up? (Answer: Why, RandomBusybodyRelative, that would put a real dent in my orgy schedule, now wouldn’t it?) I’m sure I’ll hear Lesbian staged whispered more than once (Answer: Oh, Auntie Homophobe, we’re in Massachusetts. If I were a lesbian, my sweet, loving wife would be right here at my side in this Catholic church! ) Someone is almost certain to try to fix me up.Sassy, I have a young man I’d like you to meet. Well, he isn’t so young anymore, and he’s fat and doesn’t have all of his own teeth, but he isn’t afraid of a single, educated working girl like you. Why don’t I introduce you? (Answer: Well, there is no answer. I’ll probably wind up meeting the feller and smiling wanly at his jokes in the name of politeness.) While I wish that everyone would just leave me alone, I suppose all this concern is my family’s way of saying that they love me and want to see me happy. Sigh… Minus Three

Speaking of Auntie Homophobe, she’s pissed, and I’m pleased as punch. The Massachusetts legislature refused to put discrimination to a vote. Gay marriage will stand in Massachusetts for the foreseeable future. Deval Patrick actually did something right in getting behind this fight. Plus Five

James K. Seale, a former member of the KKK, was convicted in the 1964 murder of two black teenagers. He got to live almost his entire life as a free man, but justice has finally been served in this Civil Rights era case. Plus Four

Realized that I have better options now than I did when I was dating McArtsyPants. Plus Five

Republicans in the Senate rally to support an Attorney General who takes advantage of the sick and possibly dying to reauthorize an illegal wire-tapping program. Yeah, they are the party of morals. Disgusting. Minus Two

I had a fantastic weekend last weekend. Great date, great visit from a friend, creepy conversation with Lawnmoah Man, what more can anyone ask for? Plus Ten

It’s looking more and more like Scooter Libby will really go to the clink. Too bad he needs a pardon from W to avoid it. If it were up to the Republicans in Congress, he’d probably get it. Plus Two

Bye, bye, Dr. Burke. Isaiah Washington’s big mouth and volatile temper get him canned from Grey’s. It’s not exactly shocking news, but there it is. I can’t say as I’m sorry. He did cajole Christina into getting her eyebrows removed, only to jilt her at the altar. Even

The Red Sox are in a slump. Still, they are 7.5 games ahead of the evil Yankees. Minus Two

Total Plus: 25
Total Minus: 7


Last Week’s Total: -4

The Sassy Sundries: My Week in Review

Time keeps going faster and faster, it seems. Here we are at another Friday, and a beautiful one at that. The sun is shining, flowers are in bloom, and it’s time to tally up the week’s events. What a mindfuck of a week it’s been, too. Overall, I’m in a fine mood, but when W is unleashed on the world, it’s time to be scared. Oh, that and Oprah and Paris Hilton.

Behold, the week’s Sassy Sundries:

Oprah picked Middlesex for her book club. What the hell? Why, why, why does she have to go and ruin every good book? It’s bad enough that you can’t get a copy of The Virgin Suicides without a picture of Kirsten Dunst on it, but now we have to have the dreaded “O” business on the cover of Middlesex? Why couldn’t Jeffrey Eugenides be like Jonathan Franzen and tell Oprah to stick it where the sun don’t shine? Gah! Minus Five

Have hot date tonight with McI. The fashion gods smiled upon me, and I found the sexiest little black dress for an evening of jazz and… No, Dive. No pictures. Plus Ten

Scooter Libby gets 2.5 years in the slammer for lying about the leak in the Valerie Plame case. Now we just need to get Rove and Cheney behind bars. Plus Five

Speaking of prison, Paris Hilton took up residence in her new digs and then decided that she didn’t like clink. And guess what? They let her out! The LA Sheriff allowed the repeat drunk driver out of jail for a “medical problem.” I hope the law takes pity on the poor kid arrested with a joint, but somehow I doubt it. It’s not like they let Martha Stewart out because her uniform clashed with her towel. Makes me sick, I tell you. Minus Ten
Update: She’s going back to the slammer. Poor thing cried. Hee hee.

Have potential new career as a private eye. Will begin scouring stores at once for 30s noir dresses, and will come up with new hair style. Can anyone tell me how to sound like Lauren Bacall? Craigslist is fun. Plus Two

My parents saw the new bachelorette pad, and my mother didn’t make one condescending comment. Plus Three

George W. Bush blows hot air about global warming. What can you expect from an oil man? I’m glad he got a tummy ache. Too bad he didn’t barf all over some world leader like his old man did. Minus Ten

My friend Smokestack is coming to visit me tomorrow afternoon. A grand time shall be had. Plus Five

What the hell is going on with the rhetoric between Bush and Putin? Are we back to the Cold War or something? Note to George: Using the word “hyperventilating” to describe a touchy situation isn’t very diplomatic. Please don’t get me nuked. I’d really like to live to see thirty-four. Minus Five

Things are looking up on the roommate front. I have two possible candidates who would do just fine. Plus Four

Have potential stalker problem on my hands, in the form of Neighbor’s ex-boyfriend. Minus Three

Total Plus: 29
Total Minus: 33

Last Week’s Total: +14

The Sassy Sundries: My Week in Review

Happy Friday! It’s time once again for me to give my weekly tally of things political, personal, and nonsensical (idea stolen from the Bean Counter column in Boston’s Weekly Dig).

Here are this week’s Sassy Sundries:

My effing leg caused me to miss Grey’s Anatomy last night. One of these days, I should become a real American and get cable. Don’t tell me what happened. I’ll watch it online tonight, Friday night, while in bed with an ice pack on my appendage. Hrmph. Minus Ten

Congress hands Bush the Iraq War spending bill with a timetable for withdrawal on the fourth anniversary of the Mission Accomplished speech—a very nice bit of timing, allowing everyone the chance to snicker at the image of W in his flight suit. Plus Five

Bush vetoes the Iraq War spending bill, saying that he’s “the Commander Guy” (I thought he was “the Decider”) and that we can’t set a deadline for failure. Ummm… didn’t failure already happen about four years ago? Veto sustained in Congress, but message still sent that the American people are no longer behind this war. Minus Three

Before the return of the leg injury, got to do some dancing with McI. Plus Ten

Things just keep getting worse at the halls of justice. That Monica Goodling. No wonder she pled the fifth. It might work, too. In exchange for her testimony, she may avoid prosecution. Minus Two

Have discovered Casey’s, a most excellent local watering hole and contender for my favorite alternate parallel universe. Expect a post about Casey’s soon. Plus Three

Former CIA chief George Tenet tries to explain his actions in the days leading up to the Iraq War. While anyone paying attention knows that the White House was hell-bent on going to war with Iraq with or without the “slam dunk” quote, Tenet still comes off sounding self-serving and disingenuous (and not a little crazy). Even

Sometimes, wonderful things arrive through the mail. While I fear for the little old ladies of the world, I really needed the laugh. Plus Ten

Total Plus: 28
Total Minus: 15


Last Week’s Total: Minus 25,000,000,005

Week from Hell: Gun Control, War, the Attorney General, the World Bank, and Abortion Rights

What a week to be in a self-absorbed cocoon. While I was getting beaten, bruised, and strained in the act of moving, quite a week was going on out there. I don’t know how to rank this stuff, most of it is so bad, so the Sassy Sundries will be back next week.

Thanks to the militancy of the National Rifle Association, an insane young man was able to purchase guns and ammunition and shoot up his school. Somehow I don’t think that the Founders envisioned the kinds of arms we have available today when they introduced the right for states to raise militias into the Constitution. It angers me beyond belief that this tragedy could have been averted, if only our society would take both mental health and gun control more seriously.

While media outlets have been airing poignant portraits of the individuals killed in the Virginia Tech shooting, some two hundred Iraqis died in suicide bombings this week. This surge simply isn’t working. As Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid has said, we can’t win this war militarily. But our Decider-in-Chief insists that surging will win the Global War on Terror. Guess we better trust him then.

The Decider steadfastly stood by his man in the hall of justice, despite his demonstrated incompetence and deceitfulness. Even his Republican allies castigated Attorney General Alberto Gonzales’s performance at his hearing yesterday. How can a guy who graduated from Harvard Law forget so much? Let’s hope Gonzales, who argues that the Constitution does not actually contain the right to Habeas Corpus and that the Geneva Conventions rules outlawing torture are “quaint” and outdated, will soon be left to the dustbin of history.

One of the chief architects of the Iraq War and pal of the Decider Paul Wolfowitz vowed as head of the World Bank to go after corruption. Guess he never thought that anyone would find out that he stashed his girlfriend in the State Department and arranged for her to get sweet promotions and even sweeter paychecks. It must be nice to have the head of the World Bank as your sugar daddy.

The Bush-packed Supreme Court decided this week that women don’t have rights over their own bodies. Roberts and Alito ruled with Scalia, Thomas, and Kennedy that despite expert medical opinion, that banning the so-called “partial birth abortion” was just fine. The dilation and extraction procedure (and potentially, due to the bill’s vague language, some second-trimester abortion procedures) is never, ever necessary, even if the mother’s life is at stake, because these guys said so.

I think I’ll try to repair my self-absorbed cocoon and see if I can’t get back in it. This is just too much.

Hypocrites Much? Thoughts on the US Attorneys Scandal

Republicans. I can’t believe them. After getting caught firing eight US attorneys for exclusively political reasons so that they could use the misguided USA Patriot Act to replace the attorneys with ones more amenable to the Bush & Co. line, the Administration is acting like the Democrats are playing nothing but politics. Bush refuses to allow his people to testify under oath, charging that to do anything else would be a partisan “fishing expedition.”

I’m sorry, but what the hell? This is coming from the head of a party that impeached a president over a BLOW JOB. The sex life of the president had no bearing on his ability to effectively govern (and if you disagree with that statement, you’d best reevaluate your judgment of most US presidents), and yet the country was bogged down by Republican viciousness for years. But asking the White House to testify under oath about something that has a significant impact on the running of the country is pandering to politics?

I don’t think that the firing of these attorneys is the worst thing Gonzales has done. That said, he still needs to answer for it. Rove needs to address his role as well. And once that’s done, Congress needs to repeal the Patriot Act.

George W. Bush needs to shut up about partisanship already. He’s the worst offender of them all.

The Sassy Sundries: My Week in Review

Is it really Friday again? Holy crap. Well I guess that means it’s time for the Sassy Sundries, an idea I’ve ripped off from Boston’s Weekly Dig. Here I assign numerical values to things political, personal, and nonsensical from the past week. Enjoy!

Once again, Dick Cheney is not having a great time of it. First his aide, Scooter Libby, gets convicted of four of the five counts against him. From the court proceedings, it’s obvious that Cheney was involved in the leak. Then the guy gets just one more reminder that he’s a walking corpse. As a human being, I wish him no harm, but wouldn’t it be nice if Satan stepped down? Plus Three

Scooter Libby might have gotten convicted, but Rove and Cheney escape unscathed. Minus Two

In local politics, our new Governor is making misstep after misstep; the latest one has generated an ethics complaint. Still, he handled the immigration situation nicely. Minus Two

I was still a bit confused by McIntriguing this week, but things really are great now. Goofy grin has returned. Sorry. Plus Ten

Hedged bets in the romantic department after confusing McIntriguing activity and replied to an e-mail from another interesting fellow. Am now feeling a bit conflicted about it, but am pleased with myself for treating dating as dating until it becomes something else. Plus Two

Redid iPod this week. I haven’t listened to the Jesus and Mary Chain in ages. Also obtained the latest Arcade Fire release on iTunes. Am moving up in technology world. Plus One

Evidence comes out that the FBI is taking major league advantage of the Patriot Act. Shock, Shock. Minus Two

General Petraeus, the general in charge of the Iraq “surge,” says that there isn’t a military solution to the war. The general is a rocket scientist. Bush doesn’t listen to scientists. Minus Two

U2’s Joshua Tree album came out twenty years ago today. I remember the day clearly—Smokestack and I sat around discussing the merits of the band’s new approach, and she was swinging her head and torso around in time to “With or Without You.” We were in the eighth grade. I feel older than dirt. Even

Total Plus: 16
Total Minus: 8

The Sassy Sundries: My Week in Review

Here’s yet another mathematical accounting of things personal, political, and sundry in my life. I’ve stolen the idea from Boston’s Weekly Dig’s Bean Counter column. They don’t seem to have much by way of mathematical skills, either. Thanks to Before Girl for pointing out the error of my simple arithmetic last week. At least she doesn’t pick on my pre-coffee comments.

I have a date with McIntriguing tomorrow evening. Plus Ten

According to Salon.com’s War Room, a recent Pew Research Center, the words most commonly volunteered to describe W are “incompetent” and “arrogant.” “Ass” comes in at number 13. Here’s to the Ass-in-Chief, our leader. Minus Three

I got to see Dear Prudence for the first time in ages. It was a good, if not nearly long enough, visit. Plus Five

Unlike the US Senate, the House has a spine. This week’s debate on the non-binding Iraq War resolution gives me some hope that Congress might start standing up to the Administration. Plus Two

Meanwhile, the war rages on, and the Democrats are scared about being called weak on defense. Minus Five

V-Day passed without incident. Even

Winter weather finally decided to show up. Even though it was mostly freezing rain, I still got that snowed-in feeling. Plus Two

I had a nasty case of the flu. Minus Three

“Raspberry Beret” just came on my iPod. One. Two. One, two, three, uh! Plus One

Plus Total: 20
Minus Total: 11
Total for the Week: Plus 9
Last Week’s Total: Bad Math

The Sassy Sundries: My Week in Review

Here I consider matters personal, political, and nonsensical from my week and assign a numerical value. I’ve stolen this idea from the Boston’s Weekly Dig’s Bean Counter column.

Spineless Republicans supposedly in favor of a non-binding resolution criticizing the president’s ill-conceived surge vote against debating the measure. Minus Five

I reconnected with a friend, and it was good. Plus Four

RIP, Anna Nicole Smith, victim of stereotype and the media. She had nary a brain cell in her head, but that makes it all the more reprehensible that people reveled in her exploitation. Minus Two

A most interesting e-mail exchange with McIntriguing has me smiling a lot. Plus Five

I had to resort to platitudes to calm myself down while I waited for the e-mail to ring. Minus One

Bush’s foreign “policy” of late has me even more worried than usual. This article lays out the sheer idiocy of the Administration’s posturing on Iran. And although this article James sent me doesn’t have a lot of new information, it lays out a very convincing case for the real motivations behind our Middle East policy. Minus Five

I got to knit with Grey’s when the show was actually on. Thanks, Carissa! (If you haven’t checked out her critique of the show’s location issues and other crimes against Seattle, you should. It’s a scream.) Plus Four

I’m going to New Hampshire tonight, and I’m going to see my favorite dog. Oh, and my parents. That will be nice too. Plus Three

Plus Total: 16
Minus Total: 16

Verdict: Even
Last Week’s Total: Minus 1

My Week in Review

Boston’s Weekly Dig has a column called the Bean Counter where they assign numerical values to the week’s events. I thought I would do my own. Behold, the Sassy Sundries.

I joined another online dating site and got six guys trying to instant message me at once. Plus Two

None of them were really my type.
Minus One

City of Boston brought to its knees by Lite Brite. I can’t stop laughing.
Plus One

Everyone keeps calling it a “terrorist hoax,” even though it was just a marketing campaign and wasn’t meant to scare anyone.
Minus One

The guys employed by Turner Network to hang the “bombs” monkey around with the press and talk about hairstyles. Plus Three

Molly Ivins, one of the sharpest, sassiest, and insightful columnists in the country dies. Minus Four

Dive’s reaction to finding out that I was a cheerleader. Plus Five

Scientists from around the world state unequivocally that global warming is real and that the burning of fossil fuels is the culprit. Plus Five

Bush won’t do anything about it except talk about nuke-u-lar power.
Minus Four

The Administration wants to go to war with Iran. I had been hoping that Seymour Hersh’s New Yorker article was wrong, even though I knew better.
Minus Five

We haven’t had real snow yet, and it’s freaking me out. Minus Two

Plus Total: 16
Minus Total: 17

Total for the Week: Minus 1

If my math’s wrong, tough. The Dig messes it up too.